I started with a lot of emotions – pure emotions, mainly anger, desperation and fear.
In the process, I was comforted that it was not all about emotions (contrary to what I expected), it was more structured which allowed me to stay on track on what I should be working on during the session. In hindsight I really appreciated my coach Lulu for pulling me out of some dark emotional alleys during our discussions. Because of this, I learned to trust the process – that it is also rational and not just emotional. I learned not to take my emotions too seriously, to have a healthier perspective of my experiences and what I’m going thorough – at the same time it taught me to trust my emotions, something that is quite hard to do for someone who is always angry and scared. Regards emotions, the process taught me to separate rational, lucid, reasonable emotions from simple drama.
My biggest take away from the coaching process is ACCOUNTABILITY. It’s a very humbling self awareness that our life is our own making. Our perceptions lead to choices, which lead to decisions, which in turn lead to our current realities. So “renovating my house”, showed me all the possibilities, and from these possibilities working hard on choosing what exactly needs fixing, where do I begin to avoid unnecessary work and losing time. Of course you can make mistakes – and that’s where a good Coach comes in, to get you back on track.
How much closer am I to my goals? For some almost there, for other de-prioritised and for most still in the process of getting there. I can give numbers to quantify a perception of success rate – but I’d rather say I’m not so angry anymore, my kids are learning to trust me more, I play with them now and my husband noticed and appreciated that I do listen to him now. He also said I take the time to thank him sincerely now. Going from one epiphany to the next, in trickles happening mostly on ordinary, unassuming days I have arrived to where I am now; with a refreshing self awareness of my limitations and my strengths and really feeling right about them instead of beating myself up. I have a healthier perception of what I can and cannot do.